Baby Steps

Chloe has always been a bit hesitant. She has often thought she wasn’t ready for the next challenge.

When she was three, I held the back of her shirt while she worked out how to balance on the playground structures through tears. Once she got it, she loved the park.

When she was eight, I forced her to ride her bike around trash cans in the court so she could turn. I’ll never forget the way she screamed that I was torturing her and then laughed at the feeling of wind in her hair.

When elementary school ended, she didn’t feel ready for Junior High. All she could think about was lockers and switching classes and so much homework. I helped her see the fun of what was ahead.

And, when JH ended she didn’t feel ready for high school... bigger campus, more pressure about grades and relationships and “everything matters for college”. I encouraged her to explore her gifts and find places that felt safe for that season like drama and sign language.

By pushing through fears and doubts, she found herself, her passions and her courage.

Today, we drop her off for a six week internship with Joni and Friends and she’s ready! She’s excited and a little terrified just as she should be! I’m so proud of her, the way she loves people, the work she’s done to get here, and her willingness to step out in faith to find out what God has prepared for her.

This mom thing is a paradox. Love them well, push them through, and they get brave enough to leave.

Today, I’m the one who’s not ready. If I’m really honest, I haven’t ever been.

I was afraid to let go of her little shirt and that bike seat because I didn’t want her to get hurt... but I pushed us both. I paced and prayed us both through junior high and high school - begging God for kind friends, compassionate teachers, safety and good choices.

I committed as a young mom to not let my fear ever hold my kids back.

So, today I’m dropping her off at a host home for 42 days. I’ll be praying and pacing and waiting for updates.

I know deep down that the God who trusted her to me will be with her every step of the way and Chloe’s ready.

He is Enough!

#heisenough #42days